Depression.

Depression is a long and hard struggle- some come out with scars and no tears left, some come out a better person all round, and some don't come out at all. 

Depression has been my life for a little over a year and a half. It seems a little odd and confronting to put this up on the internet for you's all to see but, I've missed blogging so much, but my head hasn't been in the right place- until just this morning- at 2am, my best friends father passed away after a four year fight with an illness caused by asepsis. He was an amazing man, inspiring and strong and bloody hilarious. He put up with the midnight giggle attacks and 9am wake ups from my friend, her littler brother, my older brother, and I to watch and support our soccer. From him i've always found that new sense of life they talk about in the movies, you know- wake up everyday like it's your last and always remember to laugh? 

From him I drew my courage to write this, 

to return to blogging, 

to make him proud and to show everyone that it's okay- it'll always be okay

(which coming from me sounds completely crazy- I have depression and can still say this, because I hope with my heart of hearts it'll be true, and I know it will- it's up to me to make it true, and to all of you to make whatever you what in life work out.)

Leave any questions below, or on my twitter here.

I love you's all dearly! 

hugs, kisses and best wishes,

- Amber May xxo

*AUSTRALIA ONLY* 

kids helpline- 1800 551 800 (free call)

lifeline- 131114 (free from mobiles)

rural link- 1800 552 002 (free call)

My Vowels to you.

Hey guys, I hope you're all just as excited for as I am for a new month in a few days!

I was going to do a review of the songs off Sleeping With Sirens new album Feel that are out, but decided I will do a whole album review once it's out (June 4th- help me.) Instead, these are my blogger vowels to you.

1) I will always love each and everyone of you.

2) If you have a question, I will try my hardest to get back to you asap.

3) Nothing will ever be too little for me to care about.

4) I will always be into music and letting you now what I love.

5) I will be as honest with you's all and share my stories and experiences with you. ( manners please, guys.)

6) I will never stop having my say. (good thing, or not?)

7) You can use me as something you've read to extend your vocabulary for English.

8) I probably won't ever stop using words you have all loved; Fancy, Lovely, Funky etc. (or is it ect?)

9) One day I will find out whether it is etc or ect. 

10) No matter what, I will always be a fangirl.  

In regards to number 10, I think I need to start watching every season ever of Supernatural? 

and with that, I say I Do.

Song;  Son Of A Gun- For The Foxes.

My friend got two new bracelets, and I took this (iPhone) for her Instagram.
I love it.

Hugs, kisses and bets wishes,

-Amber May xxo

Kids With Cancer.

I'm about to rant, but for a good cause. 

Princess Margaret Hospital is my local (I say local, but I mean Perth, capital city of WA) children's hospital. They deal with everything, but something that really, I guess, touches me, is the cancer wards. There are so many rooms, filled with kids who have cancer and it amazes me how positive they all are.

When I was in year 7 (2011) my aunty, who was my best friend in the world, was diagnosed with a type of cancer. 
I can remember the day, I was there before she was sent to Perth, I was there when everyone was crying because we all knew, but didn't want to say it aloud. 
This is something I would never wish upon anyone.It's so heartbreaking, and I'm tearing up just writing about it. 

I can not even imagine what it would feel like if she was a child. 
I mean, someone so young with so much ahead of them- being diagnosed with what could kill them?
Troye Sivan, a local (again, from Perth) youtuber gave himself the task of helping these children out.
He wrote a song about the book "The Fault in our Stars" by John Green.
Then, he filmed the video at PMH.
Lastly Troye posted it, and every single cent of sales for this song goes to the hospital and their work.

I was so moved by a young boy, helping out these kids.

It is seriously the most adorable and inspiring thing.

Help out if you can and give Troye a sub on YT for more of his amazing singing and kindness!

Donate-  every cent matters to someone.

Buy the song on Itunes or Bandcamp  and all the money also goes to the cause. 

Song: 

All About Us- He Is We (feat; Owl City)

*Sorry, no photography with these, but I think the cuteness of mr. Troye makes up for that! 

Hugs, kisses and Best Wishes,

- Amber May xxo

Conformity

Hello all you lovely people!

Today, I'd like to talk about conformity. 

For those of you who don't know what this means, Conformity is the act of matching attitudes, beliefs, and behaviours.

So basically it is changing yourself to fit it and be accepted by others. 

I have had a very recent case of this where I have been told that I am wrong for an opinion. (Sorry, to my friends reading this who are involved)

I am going to see One Direction live 138 days (28th september, for those in Perth also going!) for the Take Me Home Tour. 

At school, we were discussing concerts and I brought up that I am going. 

Everyone immediately asked why I would go, if I liked them, and told me they were 'gay' and 'have no good songs'. 

My first reaction was to explain that yes, I like them but aren't a crazy fangirl over them. 

Then, I thought why was I going to defend myself.

I just wanted to fit in with their opinions. (I went on the defend the boys- yay)

You do not need to fit in and be like anyone else.

It isn't going to get you anywhere.

No matter what you want to become, being remembered is how you get there.

Standing out is such a good thing, being a bit quirky and different makes you much more interesting. 

Song- 

Augie Nieto- Five For Fighting. (I love how strange and sweet it is)

My best friend, is weird.
But that is why I love her.

I won't be having set days anymore to post, as school is becoming crazy. 

Follow my twitter, tumblr or my blog (of course) to be notified when I do update.

(Still 1-2 a week, and maybe more..)

Hugs, kisses and best wishes,

-Amber May xxo

Ready for the Winter Months.

Ready for the Winter Months.

Hello, all! 

If you follow me on Instagram, you will know I have acquired (do people still say that? anyway, I got some) new shirts.

2 of these I have "stolen" form my brothers closet and he has so much style and I love, love, love his clothes! 

The other one (the Nirvana) I brought whilst in town to buy a pair of jeans..which I didn't end up finding.

Also, on this shopping trip I saw a boy with a Pierce the Veil shirt on, and wanted to marry him.

*Mind the fact he looked about 12.

Is it okay to wear your brothers clothes? If so, what kinds of made-for-guys clothes do you adore this season? 

Song-

Dreamers- Jack Be Nimble Band

Hugs, kisses and best wishes,

-Amber May xxo

Excuse me, but I actually exist.

Excuse me, but I actually exist.

Attention;

It's a noun that has a definition of Notice taken of someone or something; the regarding of someone or something as interesting or important.

We all want attention and we all like to give the things we like attention.

But what about when something you like doesn't give you the same?

It's a horrible feeling, I've been there!

Everyone says to continue the attention, or ask them what's up with the situation..

Personally, I believe if you are the only one making the effort in a relationship (including friends), for a long period of time, then you should let it go. 

I don't mean when you tweet you'r favourite band and they don't retweet you, That's a different situation. 

I'm talking about your best friend, your boyfriend, or your new friend.

You need to be able to recognise when you're the initiator all the time, when the same person cancels on you every time and when their excuses are fake as unicorns.

Give it up, let it go and make a new friend who you think will give the the attention that you deserve! 

Love this picture I took in Bali, of my staple food.
m&m's are the world.

Song;

Lightening In A Bottle - The Summer Set ( I really love this band lately.)

Tweet me.

Ask me.

Stalk me. (This is a new tumblr, will get better pinky swear.)

Look at me.

Hugs, Kisses and Best Wishes,

-Amber May xxo

Bali Love #1

Bali Love. #1

Lights at Nirvana restaurant in Bali.

Hello there lovely people, I'm very sorry for the non social contact.

As you's know, I'm in Bali! 

I love Bali like my second home and have been having a great time here with my friends.

I 100% recommend coming to Bali for a quick holiday- It's stunning and really changes your view on things.

Some people here are so desperate for business, but still help others in the markets sell their things. It's so beautiful and so kind.

I'm really looking forward to a bracelet shop soon as there are so many awesome things to buy!
I'm thinking a Bali Haul once I'm back?
Well, I better go and order my room service- Apple Pie is a must tonight! 

Song-
Coffeshop (acoustic)- All Time Low.

Hugs, Kiss and Best Wishes,
-Amber May xxo

Mummy, I Want To Travel The World.

Mummy, I Want To Travel The World.

All I have ever wanted to do was travel the world and take photos.

I think that my inspiration for wanting to be a music photographer, like Adam Elmakias, comes from.

I want to see the Eiffel Tower, no matter how many friends have been there and have said it's not all that great. 

I also would adore seeing the Colosseum in Rome.

I want to be able to sit down with my children when I'm older and tell them tales about everything I saw & the people I met.

I want to be able to show them photos of me.

I want to have a hot chocolate with two marshmallows in every country. 

Is this too much of a big dream?

I believe that if you are meant to do something then it will happen,

I just hope I'm meant to travel the world and be a music photographer.

*I'm going to Bali on Monday (squeals) so there wont be a new post (aww..) 

BUT wait, there's more!

The hotel I am staying at apparently has wi-fi so depending on how good it is/wether I get enough private time there will be updates. 

Follow me on Twitter for when here; https://twitter.com/AmberMay38 

Follow me on Instragam for (hopefully) loads of updates and photos here; http://instagram.com/ambermay38

Song-

Little House- The Fray

Hugs, Kisses and Best Wishes,

-Amber May xxo

My Love For.. (Soccer)

My Love For.. (Soccer)

I have always grown up with soccer-

My has played since he was 5, and I have watched & enjoyed since I was 3.

It's an amazing sport that really copes it for being "gay"- as if that is even an insult in 2013.

Soccer is a skill, a passion, a life and a community.

I love that you get out what you put it- you need to have fitness and you need to work for straight kicks and good play.

When you're on the pitch, you forget about everything, you forget about the people watching and all that matters in getting that ball in the net. 

The community around my soccer club, personally, is amazing. 

I play for the women, and my brother plays for the men.

All the men know me because of this and they are all so kind to me.

They help me feel o-k when there is thunder at training or even a game, as they know I have a phobia of it.

They all care about each other and support our players who have gone further than the local club. 

-Joshy Risdon, we love you so much and can't wait for you to be able to make it down here ever weekend and watch us! #19

Joshua Risdon doing the 'T' for Tric for our club.
#Tric4life.

Also, my favourite thing in the whole world is the noise soccer boots make on hard ground! Weird, I know..

Song;

Let Her Go- Passenger.

Hugs, Kisses and Best Wishes,

-Amber May xxo

Questions, Answers & a Party.

 Questions, Answers & a Party.

1. Why haven't you blogged/updated social networking in a while?

I'm so sorry, but as you can tell it's not just my blog I haven't been on. I have had a very busy week with school and have had a fair amount of tests and essay's to do. I also went back to dancing for the first time since my appendix and soccer has been hectic.

2. How was your first soccer game?

It was amazing, I was so nervous before but a friend reassured me and then I was fine. I played really well in my position (Left back, for soccer nerds!) and was very proud.

Team Photo!

3. What about your photo challenge?

I am not going to upload this until next month- I'll still have a peep at yours if you did it, but I will do it again soon.

4. Party..what party?!

I'm going to a party tomorrow at a club sort of place called Barbados. They sponsor my soccer club and we are having a Season Launch there. It's going to loads of fun with all the older guys/girls I play with.

5. Tell us what you're wearing- du'uh.

Top; We have to wear out club shirts that look like this!

Bottoms; A tight high wasted black skirt (it has to be black bottoms..)

Shoes; Just black wedges.

Hair/makeup; Hair is going to be straight and to one side and my makeup is normal foundation with mascara- nothing too fancy as I don't want to look 18 just yet!

Nails; This colour, which as you's know is my favourite!

So guys, that's about it. I need to go and take this face mask off now, I might scare my brother. 

I hope that none of you are too mad at me & can forgive me- year 9 is proving a bit hard! 

I love you's all who take the time to read this! 

Song of the week is 

Bite My Tongue- YouMeAtSix featuring Oli Skyes (from BMTH)

VOTE FOR MY FRIEND who plays for Perth Glory to become Player of the Year. Josh Risdon ❤ 

Hugs, Kisses and Best Wishes,

-Amber May, xxo

Augusta.

Augusta.

It's Friday, and time for me to sit down and think of what I would like to highlight about my trip to Augusta.

Firstly, I want to introduce to you my model friend Jasmine (I met her before she got into modelling, before anyone suggests that I'm with her for that aspect) She is a lovely girl, and always cheers me up when I'm down. I love her so much and can not wait to watch her run way shows in New York when she's crazy famous. 

I also want to tell you that everyone should visit this little (when I say little, I mean the most popular shop is IGA..) once in their life, if not to just experience the odd wether changes!

There are stunning little stops of the way to the Lighthouse that have an extremely pretty view of the beach.

Being the only photographer kind of person on the trip, it was great that my brother was driving/leading everyone so that I could say stop here and we'd all get out and get some great shots! 

Jasmine was so much fun to photograph and we had a blast together.

This is at the lighthouse we visited and Jasmine being Indie-rock.

Below, is a bit more of a serious shot. 
This photo really shows of her legs, fashion taste and strong lines

This photo is (obviously) not of Jasmine, but I really love this. This is Jasmine's brother, My brother and a friend of theirs of a couch they made out of sand in Hamlin Bay. I love the way Brad has his arm is  around the other's and how they are looking out and watching the water.

Wow, that was a long post! 

I hope the photo's made it a more interesting read for you all. 

I have a challenge for you's this week;

Take a photo everyday starting today and I'm going to do the same. At the end of the week, make a post with each photo and why you like or dislike it. Selfies are allowed as you's are all 100% cute but try maybe sun sunset shots, or even an absent minded friend!  Make sure you comment below if you're taking part so i can check it out! 

Song of the week;

Seventy times 7- Brand New (Read the story behind it and listen to the retaliation of Taking Back Sunday with There's no "I" in team) 

Hugs, kisses and Best wishes,

- Amber May xxo

Easter.

Easter.

Wow, I can't believe it's already April! 

I'm very sorry for not posting on Friday & that this is just a quick update on what's been up! So, here's my week and, well, my excuses for being so absent!

Monday- I posted about blue!

Tuesday- Was the day after I posted.

Wednesday- I had soccer training (and am so ready for my first game by the way!)

Thursday- I had a party to attend.

Friday- I was off to Augusta (A very cld place down south in w.a)

Saturday- I was in Augusta still!

Sunday- For easter we went on another little road trip to Hamlin Bay (a beach) for the day.

Monday- Well guys, that's today! 

You see my predicament? haha.

I also did a bit of photography with a model friend of mine & I am planning on editing and things like that before Friday, so hopefully some will be ready for Friday!

Our parents aren't the best at hiding the eggs for our hunt..

What did you guy's get up to for easter?

Who you are- Jessie J.

Hugs, kisses and Best Wishes,

-Amber May xxo

My Love For.. (Blue.)

My Love For... Blue

Okay, are yous all thinking I'm a tad crazy right now, writing a whole post about the colour blue?

Well, okay- but hear me out.

Does this count as blue? I'm not sure, but I am in love with this colour.

I painted (well, I didn't personally paint my room, someone did it for me, but..) my bedroom this colour at the end of last year and I am still loving it. It makes me feel extremely calm and happy. 

It's so tropical and just makes me want to fly everywhere pretty in the world.

I really think that it's make me calmer, happy and more creative. 

Also, my favourite dress is this colour;

and an amazing candle that I recently brought which smells likes the ocean!

Two Side-Notes!

• Sorry, for the bad quality photo's, I only have my phone on me as I write this.

• Could someone please teach me how to make an origami box? Mine isn't doing too well so far!

Not Now- A Blink 182 cover by Kimmi Smiles. (An ah-maze-ing Aussie You Tuber!)

Hugs, kisses and Best wishes,

-Amber May xxo

My Bucket List.

My Bucket List.

One of the best things in the world is dreams.

And there is no better way to dream than to have a list of all the thing you'd like to do before you die. 

This is my bucket list (well my top 15 things) ;

1. Go to Sydney.
2. Swim with dolphins (This will be checked off in one month in Bali!)
3. Go to Sound Wave music festival.
4. Travel with my best friend, Jemma. (Also to be checked off, she's coming to Bali.)
5. Be recognised by my blog and/or photography.
6. Write a book.
7. Write a song.
8. Learn piano.
9. Learn guitar.
10. Be kissed in the rain. (Cheesball.)
11. A photo a day for one month. (Maybe I could do this for April & share it with you guys?)
12. Cook a three-course meal for my family.
13. A random act of kindness, once a week, for a year.
14. Move to New York.
15. Live in Noosa (QLD) for a year or so.

I know that maybe some of these things will never happen, but even if they don't- They will inspire me to get as close to them as possible.

I would love to see what is on your guy's list, so make one, post it on your blog, comment a link & I will check it out!

Hugs, kisses and best wishes.

-Amber May xxo

My love for.. (Music)

My love for music.

I guess I should try and explain my love for music. 

I've always grown up with music- But it's never gotten me through as much these last few years.

The first real band I got into and loved was a band named 'Yellow card', I was seriously addicted to their song "With you Around".

I thought it was heaven to my ears mixed with cheeky smiles and summer days. It still feels like this. I was silly back then though- I made my favourite song an 'our song' with a friend of mine, who I don't speak with anymore, so it's not as enjoyable.

After that I was into soft music, like Joe Brooks & Backseat Goodbye, that I felt could help me through bad times and broken-ness. Now I know what really helps. Songs with a meaning. They connect the best.

They make you feel like the writer has been through what you have, and came out stronger.

I had a friend who really liked Sleeping with Sirens, so I gave them a listen and 100% fell involve with guitarist and backup singer Jesse Lawson (..how could I not?!) 

Jesse at Warped Tour 2012.

Bands like Pierce the Veil, All Time Low and A Day to Remember followed on with that love.
I liked that those rock bands were all best friends with each other..
and that my idols were my idols idols (confusing, eh?)

Kellin Quinn (SWS) on meeting Austin Carlie
from band, Of Mice & Men.

My favourites song from each of my currents obsessions are;

Sleeping with Sirens-  Stomach Tied in Knots.

Pierce the Veil- A Match Into Water (This got me through a lot.)

All Time Low- Therapy, and also For Baltimore (Alex, the singer sings 'Baltimore' so..perfectly)

A Day To Remember- You Had me at Hello. 

You Me At Six (not mentioned)- Liquid Confidence.

Good Charlotte (not mentioned)- There She Goes.

Give these songs a listen if you're having a tough time, or even check out some of their other stuff for happier moods! I know I do, and they make me feel amazeballs!  Mayday Parade is also an amazing band that helped me through everything and is still totally fun to listen to! I simply couldn't choose a favourite song of theirs. 

And of course, I love One Direction. Moments is my favourite song they sing, like ever. 

Quote from All Time Low lead singer Alex Gaskarth. (Explaining a tad better than me)

Monday's for a few weeks will be a My Love For.. post.

I hope yous enjoy these and can then know some more about me!

Hugs, kisses and best wishes,

-Amber May xxo

Brothers.

Brothers.

I have one brother. 

He's older, but not much more mature.

We're actually quite close now and I believe that this is due to music. We bonded over Ed Sheeran after learning that we had the same song on repeat.

When I was younger, all I wanted was for him to be the protective big brother- but he was more the one hurting me. In the end, we were just..related. 

Two years ago, our the aunty I guess we were closest was diagnosed with cancer and my brother and I stayed at too many friends houses to count, as our parents, and even ours, main priority was her getting better.

Throughout this, we never left each other- He walked me to class and we didn't even to the same school anymore.

As we grew older, we became closer. I became friends with his friends (even the ones that weren't my favourite) and he befriended mine. 

We started going to the same gatherings and as my love for photography increased he became my #1 model!

After all this, we still fight (of course) but about little things. Like which is better- Nirvana or Pearl Jam (Nirvana) or Who's the best dancer? (Me..) but I think that's a good thing.

We're always discovering new music and I know that I can make him like any band I want to see and he'll take me to Soundwave one day! Also, we love little photography walks, even though his favourite part is editing. 

Love you Kurty.

Stay- Mayday Parade<3

Hugs, Kisses and Best wishes,

-Amber May xxo

Hospital.

Hospital.

Monday.

I said I would upload every Monday and Friday.

I am so,so sorry that I didn't but I got taken to hospital!

I had to have my appendix taken out, although after surgery everything hurts more than before. 

Have you's ever been to hospital?

I'm one of those girls that are 600% scared of them, so my four days there weren't much fun. 

In other news; 

I got to be in a flash mob for dancing, which you can watch here > Flash Mob At Ladies Day

You's may not be able to know which one I am but, when the semi- circle happens towards to end, I wave at my friends little brother on the far side! It was fantastic to be apart & going to Stakes Day.

Before the dance.

(My friend is been cropped out as I do not have her permission to blog her yet)

My friend took this of me at the beach.

I had this amazing doughnut! 

At the moment, I am falling back in love with Sleeping With Sirens. You should check them out, and drool over hot singer Kellin and totally rad guitarist Jesse. (Rodger rabbit, is a great first song!)

Hugs, Kisses and Best Wishes,
 -Amber May xxo